...on turning 30

*Photos: My Mom, Yiyita at 60, Me at 30*



Turning 30: Had I not taken off traveling for nearly 10 months, I'd feel very differently about turning 30; more helpless, more desperate, more confused. As it turns out though, turning 30 has become a gateway somehow. Everyone I know in their 30's say it's a fab time and beats the 20's...maybe cause they can only look forward to the future and not get too hung up on the joys of the past. but somehow, it feels like they're all onto something, like it's this club with a cool little secret.

So yeah, about this secret, not sure it's a secret at all. It's more about "being all the wiser and truer to yourself". I guess that one bit from Niebuhr's Serenity Prayer now rings truer than ever (and no, I'm not gonna get all religious now or anything)...

"...the grace to accept with serenity the things I cannot change, courage to change the things which should be changed, and wisdom to distinguish the one from the other. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time ..."

I've grown to love and have fun being with myself, of traveling alone, of reflecting on experiences without the guise of the crowd around me; I love that I can now choose my friends; I love that I can take off partying on my own and have a blast (like that night I went off dancing to Ibiza's "Space" club all by myself! Heck, if I went traveling in Asia for 10 months on my own, how could I pass up on this?!); it's being true to myself about what really motivates me, whether it's pretty or not; it's about making sure I leave nothing "untried". My Mom just turned 60 and she's doing FAB! That means that I have another 30 years of "new life" ahead of me, entering into them from day 1 with full consciousness, ability and impetus.... none of the shitting, crying and sleeping schedule newborns have (what a waste!). I got at least 5 years head start ahead of my previous "birth"! How exciting.

So for me, now is the time to experiment with so many different things on my mind, none of which is a firm plan, like: singing...anywhere anyhow, but seriously; putting music to all the songs I've written and recording some of them; diving in Belize and in Australia; cycling Cuba; getting a US greencard; earning some of my living from giving massage; working as a volunteer with an international aid agency; recovering my Japanese; working out until I get fit as an athlete; skiing down a powdered snow covered slope again.... for now, I'm chilling in sunny Madrid, celebrating being 30.